Author Topic: What is it really like...❤️  (Read 2025 times)

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Offline Complete

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Re: What is it really like...❤️
« Reply #20 on: February 19, 2020, 11:55:47 AM »
Okay fine enlighten me please.
Tissue inside your mouth SIGNIFICANTLY DIFFERENT from what is on your leg, butt or male member, which is the source of donor tissue for your neovayina

MadameDuFromage

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Re: What is it really like...❤️
« Reply #21 on: February 19, 2020, 01:07:34 PM »
Cells that fall under the blanket term of "epithelial" are found in many different places in the body.  Epithelial mostly just means that they tend to make layers, kind of like you find in membranes, skin, etc.  Plenty to learn about it here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Epithelium

Offline Iztaccihuatl

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Re: What is it really like...❤️
« Reply #22 on: February 19, 2020, 01:40:31 PM »
Heidemarie,

I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, but he isn't men. He is a man. And a lovely one. One whom you know nothing about.
And liking something is not demanding or expecting it, nor did his words, actions or expressions imply anything to the contrary.

I guess I should perhaps be more circumspect regarding what I disclose. I've been uncharacteristically open on this thread, and that may have been a mistake. Oh well... I'll think about it later... I really need to go now...
zirconia,


I am very sorry if I offended you with my earlier post and I sincerely apologize if I did. I guess I was getting on my soapbox a bit and was talking in general terms (which is dangerous too, I know). I certainly was NOT talking about you or the man closest to your heart in particular. Sorry if I messed up.


Please accept my apologies.


Heidemarie

Offline Complete

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Re: What is it really like...❤️
« Reply #23 on: February 19, 2020, 02:17:38 PM »
So l guess what seems so diffcult for some to understand, or ar intentionally trying to ignore is the very obvious DIFFERENCE between the tissue inside your mouth and the outside if your butt, leg or penis.
Simple FACT. What is inside your mouth feels/acts much differently and BETTER than plain dry skin.

MadameDuFromage

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Re: What is it really like...❤️
« Reply #24 on: February 19, 2020, 03:39:12 PM »
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mucous_membrane

"A mucous membrane or mucosa is a membrane that lines various cavities in the body and covers the surface of internal organs. It consists of one or more layers of epithelial cells overlying a layer of loose connective tissue."

Anyway the punchline is that epithelial cells or epithelial tissue isn't just one kind of tissue.  That stuff is found all over your body and comes in different forms.

Offline Iztaccihuatl

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Re: What is it really like...❤️
« Reply #25 on: February 19, 2020, 05:26:06 PM »
For persons with an intact foreskin, they can also invert this, which is also a mucous membrane from it's inside, if they need more of such skin.


Interesting. However, the inside of my foreskin (I mean the part that touches the head of the penis) doesn't seem to be very mucosal...


Or are you saying that the entire penile skin is a mucus membrane on its inside, which is the reason it glides so easily along the penile shaft? If that is the case, why do they turn it inside out to form a neo vagina?

Offline zirconia

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Re: What is it really like...❤️
« Reply #26 on: February 19, 2020, 10:23:35 PM »
@zirconia I as an Austrian gal myself can't see any reference to your personal experience made by @Iztaccihuatl

I think it was just a expression of what we as a culture (over here) see.

Thessa

Does something you see as a culture automatically apply to an individual whom I personally... dare I say it... may be in love with?

Heidemarie said that what he told me (in what happened to be a private and lovely moment) made her cringe.  For all the reasons that she then put forth.

Note that this was in reference to a friendly and open discussion between someone whom I very much like and who likes me.

...which prompted me to  feel that I probably shouldn't be as candid as I've been. At least about anything at all involving anyone other than myself. If my words make me a target for disapproval that's one thing. If, on the other hand, I expose someone dear to me to completely unwarranted censure that is something different altogether. And WRONG.

I hope you now understand a bit better what it felt like to me. And what I meant above.


Complete,

thank you...❤️ It's concrete information based on experience like yours that I really need and find helpful...
And I do thank you for your support... I'm pretty much able to imagine scenarios myself... but its what happens and has happened in real life that counts...
It's wonderful that you were able to get what you needed. No lube and no dilation... I really want that as well. On the first try, if possible.


Skin is made up of epithelial cells.

Madame... thank you.
... I guess I don't know how to put this, and apologize if I'm totally off, but somehow this didn't sound like you wanted to be just purely helpful. I think Complete's intent in using the word she did was clear. If there was a need for additional precision, might it not have sounded more friendly to just suggest a better term?


Heidemarie
Thank you too. I do understand you didn't intend to make me feel bad.

However, what happened made me realize how painful all this this talk of male supremacy chauvinist whatever whatever seems to me. All the men I know—or all the ones I feel close to—value their friends, families, betrothed, and work as best they can to help and support them.

I'm sure there are many men who aren't like that, but doesn't the same apply to women as well? And the only person I know personally whom the world would be better without is a woman.

We're simply programmed differently, and our biology affects our actions and traits. To see increasingly vicious attacks on what makes men men feels incredibly sad to me.


Anyway... that's not what I wanted this thread to be about.


At the moment it seems that only Thessa and Complete currently find men to be lovable lovely exciting beings with whom it is possible to do things that make one feel incredibly blissful. And that I'm the only other one who seems predetermined to be part of that group.

There's plenty of talk about femininity and lesbian relationships and whatnot on every board. But practically no transitioner's point of view analogues to what my new elder sister™️ Ù©( ᐛ )Ùˆ  and I would talk about when alone, or anything else we'd discuss with my other friends in the real world.

Are the plain and simple heterosexuals truly this tiny a minority?

It makes me feel somehow lonely.
« Last Edit: April 16, 2020, 12:13:04 PM by Christine »

MadameDuFromage

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Re: What is it really like...❤️
« Reply #27 on: February 20, 2020, 06:41:57 AM »
Madame... thank you.
... I guess I don't know how to put this, and apologize if I'm totally off, but somehow this didn't sound like you wanted to be just purely helpful. I think Complete's intent in using the word she did was clear. If there was a need for additional precision, might it not have sounded more friendly to just suggest a better term?

I was trying to be helpful.  However many people take offense to being told "you're using the wrong word there" no matter how you dress the statement up.


Between this site and the other one, it would appear that hetero trans women would be in the minority. It may be that the majority of hetero trans women do not frequent such websites. They may just be preoccupied with whomever their partner is.

I think you're right.  At least what I've noticed is that a lot of younger transitioners tend to be hetero (at least more than those who transition later).  And people who grew up staring at facebook just don't use online forums it seems.  <Insert obligatory "millenials are ruining the internet" statement here>

Offline zirconia

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Re: What is it really like...❤️
« Reply #28 on: February 20, 2020, 06:55:47 AM »
Madame,

OK... thanks❤️... and my apologies for doubting your motives. m(_ _)m

I agree that it's always nice to point out factual errors while at the same time offering the scientifically accurate terminology. After all, that's how we learn.

I myself have also always wished I had the courage to do so, whenever I've seen someone on the forums e.g. call a vulva a vagina. ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶

Offline zirconia

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Re: What is it really like...❤️
« Reply #29 on: February 20, 2020, 07:43:22 AM »
Thank you for your response. And for being glad for me...

Percentages... yes...

Since Thessa says she's pansexual, the only heterosexual post-op who has responded to recount her personal experiences so far is Complete. Out of a membership of over 200 isn't that more like 0.5%?  Maybe I'm just feeling moribund today, but... I do still feel lonely...

It may be that the majority of hetero trans women do not frequent such websites. They may just be preoccupied with whomever their partner is.

Hi, Lady,

Yes... I do see what you mean. If so, I guess that to balance the membership of this site (minus you and Complete and Moni) there must be about 97 women who similarly to Complete have basically just moved on, and are now living normal lives at a distance from the trans community.

I hope that really is true. It definitely makes my future prospects look brighter. As I've mentioned, I really dreaded taking the first step, because I was absolutely terrified of getting stuck somewhere in between—and still feel momentary terror every now and then. In that sense I really would like to see more people like Complete here. It would hugely encourage everyone with feelings like mine...

I really want and need to just leave all the pain behind and live once I'm through with surgery...
« Last Edit: April 16, 2020, 12:11:19 PM by Christine »

Offline karen_A

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Re: What is it really like...❤️
« Reply #30 on: July 01, 2020, 05:16:18 PM »
I know this is an old thread but I want to comment on lubrication... I has SRS back in 1998 with Meltzer ... it was standard Penile inversion with a scrotal tissue graft (i was small "before" ... unfortunately that was the only small thing about me!)...

I know people say that with PI there is not enough lubication for intercourse... while I can not comment on it directly, I can say that if get aroused enough I can EASILY dilate with no lubricant... Although I suspect the lubricant comes from the cowpers gland and exits from the urethra, i can get pretty wet... which surprised the heck out of me. I have been in the on-line community in many different paces (Starting with the T area on Compuserve) for about 30 years... And had seen posts from a FEW who had PI and said they did not need lube and did not know what to make of them...

As one should take a lot of things on-line with grain of salt I pretty much dismissed it until I found out that it sure seems possible!

If I were to become heterosexually active (unlikely given life situation, age and looks - but it sure is something that has crossed my mind for a lot of years!) the biggest issue would be width.

I have depth of about 5.5" (not great but adequate in most cases from what I've heard)... Back in my day the largest dilator Meltzer supplied was 1 3/8"... And when I do dilate that is the one I use...

But back then right after surgery I did not know how my life would go and not too long after surgery purchased 1.5" and 1 5/8" dilators elsewhere just in case, and worked up to the largest one (though it was always a bit painful at the graft line... The scar tissue there is not very stretchy I guess).

Last week out of the blue after years, I decided to try the 1.5" dilator... but by mistake grabbed the 1 5/8" one from the drawer... It could not get it all the way in and trying to was EXCRUCIATINGLY painful at the ring of graft scar tissue...

So if I ever do become heterosexually sexually active, while I might not need to carry lube, I'll need to carry a pair of calipers! ;)

-Karen
« Last Edit: July 02, 2020, 01:13:39 PM by karen_A »

Offline zirconia

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Re: What is it really like...❤️
« Reply #31 on: July 01, 2020, 06:12:07 PM »
Hi Karen

Thank you... It's lovely of you to tell of your experience. Both lubrication and dilation are pretty big factors for me. Very big, actually. And... if you've read this thread I guess you know what I need SRS for. LOL.

Being held, near fainting, while knowing what you want so badly that it drives you wild is impossible really clarifies one's perspective. I want to be ready at any time. I need to.

I've looked at the options... and will make the booking as soon as I have the funds.

Offline Dena

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Re: What is it really like...❤️
« Reply #32 on: July 02, 2020, 12:51:43 PM »
Welcome to Trans Haven Karen. I had forgotten about this thread but I probably should add my two bits. After I had my surgery, I was provided with Permarin cream which I was to use in my vagina. Its function was to help convert the tissue of the vagina into vaginal tissue. This process would occur naturally with the estrogen in your system but using the cream would speed up the process. The end result is the vagina develops natural secreations. The amount may very from person to person and I am not sure if it's enough for full natural lubrication as I am not sexually active, but it is enough to leave marks on my underwear.

Your explanation is plausible as well and it's likely that would better explain the amount of lubrication that you have.

An additional note is there are other creams sold with different brand names and they probably cost far less than Premarin. At the time Premarin was about all that was available and that is no longer the case.
Email contact through dena@transhaven.org

Offline zirconia

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Re: What is it really like...❤️
« Reply #33 on: July 02, 2020, 03:20:06 PM »
Hi Dena

Thank you. Interesting. I did find two papers from about sixty or seventy years ago that mentioned the change, but nothing new. Nor have I seen anyone new comment about using estrogen cream except in the context of peritoneal grafts. And that only in India.

I wonder whether it's been forgotten. Or fallen out of disuse, perhaps because it doesn't work on everyone. Or perhaps premarin worked better than the newer products. The composition is very different, so that's possible too.

Also, the studies I read were made on normal girls. There could also be individual differences in how our tissues respond to estrogen... it's all quite fascinating, really.


Oh yes, and Karen... Welcome...♡